The Opposite of What We Planned
by kennagirl
Summary: When they first met, Kurt and Sebastian had ideas about how their lives would go. Reality had a different plan.
1. No One to Answer To

_I participated in Kurtbastian Week on tumblr back in August. I'm just now getting the chapters up on here._

_This was written for Day 2 of Kurtbastian Week, vacations._

* * *

**February 2013**

The sight that hit him when he walked into the coffee shop was familiar but wrong at the same time. Kurt was sitting in their booth, the one where he got Wednesday morning coffee with Sebastian, the one Kurtbastianachel (Rachel insisted on coming up with the name) ate their Sunday afternoon lunch in. But it was Thursday night, right after Sebastian's late lab on campus, so…

"Shouldn't you be right in the middle of your weekly Skype sex with Blaine right now?"

Kurt looked up, obviously startled. When he saw who was standing at the end of the table, he smiled thinly. "I don't know, Bas, you're the expert. People say break-up sex is good, but is it still appropriate when the break-up happens over a video call?"

"What?" He slid into the other side of the booth, thoughts of a late-night caffeine fix forgotten. "What happened?"

"Nothing horrible," Kurt admitted. "We've both seen it coming for a while. Christmas was awkward, but we ignored it hoping the awkwardness would go away. Even Rachel could see things weren't right, and you know how oblivious she can be sometimes."

"But no one's feeling are really hurt, right?" Sebastian asked. "You're not gonna start crying on my shoulder, are you? Because I'll let you if you really need it, but I'll also call Rachel to come save me."

"I'm not gonna cry," Kurt assured him. "I'm… numb, I guess. I know it's for the best since we fell out of love somewhere along the way, but it's still a big piece of my life that's over."

Sebastian looked at him, gears turning in his head. "What are you doing in your classes tomorrow?"

"Um," Kurt was clearly confused by the non sequitur. "Guest lecturer in one, movie in the other. Why?"

"But no tests or important projects?"

"No. Again, why?"

Sebastian slid out of the booth with his bag, then tugged the other boy to follow him. Kurt kept up the questioning, then added complaining, but still followed. Sebastian ignored him. Instead, he sent a text to the two people most likely to kill him for this.

_To: Whore of Babylon; Yentl_  
_Klaine is dead. Kidnapping Kurt for a long weekend of break-up partying. Will return him in one piece Sunday night._

They were almost to the parking garage a few blocks over where Sebastian had left his car parked when his phone dinged with a return message, and on the right floor when it dinged twice more. Once they reached the car, he unlocked it and instructed Kurt to get in. He complied, huffing his annoyance. Sebastian shut the door and walked around the back for time to check the answers.

_From: Whore of Babylon_  
_Don't get arrested. I'm not driving to wherever the hell you are to bail you out._

He rolled his eyes, knowing that was her way of telling them to be careful.

_From: Yentl_  
_I'm not sure that's a good idea Sebastian. He should be around friends right now, not sweaty strangers that want to take advantage of him. Bring him home and I'_

_From: Yentl_  
_ll have ice cream and a musical waiting._

One of these days, Rachel would actually learn to shorten her texts to keep them to one message. He stuffed his phone in his pocket and climbed into the driver's seat. Making sure to switch on the headlights, he buckled up and started pulling out of his spot.

"Now will you tell me what you're doing?"

Locking the doors in case Kurt got the stupid idea of trying to make a break for it, he kept his eyes on the pavement in front of him. "We're going to Atlantic City."

"WHAT?!"

"Hear me out, dammit." Kurt stayed silent, waiting. "We're going to Atlantic City. We're going to drink and dance with strangers and dance with each other and flirt with anyone hot enough to be worth it. During the day, I'll let you drag me to ten million shops on the Boardwalk, but you're carrying your own bags. We'll do stupid shit and have so much fun that you forget about being numb. Then we'll come back Sunday night and pretend none of it ever happened. And you'll be out of this funk because everything we're going to do will take its place."

He took a left turn onto a one-way street, listening for any kind of response from the passenger seat. Instead there was silence, one that persisted until they were at the edge of the city proper and about to get on the highway.

"You're letting me buy you new shirts. And you carry half the shopping bags."

"Only the ones of things for me."

"Deal." He stuck his right hand over the console for Sebastian to shake, which he did gladly.

"Now Hummel, what's on your bucket list that we can knock out this weekend?"

* * *

Half-past seven Sunday night had Kurt stumbling through the front door of the apartment he shared with Rachel to find her watching Funny Girl on the couch with a bored Santana. He dropped the thirteen shopping bags, the cause of his unbalance, at the end of the couch, then flopped down.

The girls took in the sight of him. Clothes meant for clubbing, scented with alcohol. Either the faint beginnings or the tail end of a hickey on his neck. Glitter trapped around the corners of his eyes and in his hairline. The hair itself, which was suddenly bright blue. Most important though was the relaxed smile on his face.

"Did you have a good weekend?" Santana asked, smirking like she already knew the answer.

Kurt hummed contentedly. "What happens in Atlantic City stays in Atlantic City."

"That's not an answer," Rachel reminded him.

"I know." He stood and stretched, allowing the shirt to ride up. "I'm going to take a shower." He turned his back on the girls, unaware that his shirt hadn't gone back down. A new strip of red and black ink was clearly visible just above his waistband.


	2. So Wonderfully Good Inside

_Written for Day 3 of Kurtbastian Week, kinks (or kittens, but I guess you can tell which one I picked)._

* * *

**September 2013**

Sebastian wasn't sure how it happened. First was the question of how he ended up being friends with Kurt, Rachel, and Santana. Then was why he agreed to go to that shitty NYADA house party Rachel found out about. Why he offered his apartment for drinking when they found out how shitty the party was. Why he busted out the strong stuff. Why they started playing a four-person game of truth or dare like they were at a middle school sleepover. How he wound up sharing his bed with Kurt.

How they ended up spooning with his hard-on ground against Kurt's ass, and said ass pushing back.

_"Truth."_

_Sebastian grinned wickedly. "What's your biggest kink?"_

_Rachel fidgeted. "Well, Finn and I never really—"_

_"He didn't ask what you and Finnocence got up to," Santana interrupted. "What's the thing that turns you on the most?"_

_Taking a sip from her cup, Rachel snuggled back into Kurt's side. "I— I would like to be—" She tried to bury her face in his vest and mumble, but Kurt poked her until she faced the room and said, "I want to be spanked."_

_There was silence for a moment before Kurt said, "Use my good moisturizer for your legs because you ran out of shaving cream again and I can take care of that."_

_Rachel pouted while Sebastian and Santana snickered. "Fine. Kurt, truth or dare?"_

_"Truth."_

_"What's __**your**__ biggest kink?"_

_Kurt looked upward, thinking face on. "I want to be tied to the bed. Teased. With vibrators. Kept on the edge for hours. Coming until I can't stand it anymore."_

_"She said one, not a list of random kinks," Santana said, mixing a new drink for herself._

_"If I have my way, that is happening to all at once," Kurt sniffed. "But if you insist, I'll just take the bondage." He took a sip from his plastic cup. "Now Satan, truth or dare?"_

Four hours and a bottle of Everclear 190 later, Sebastian was mouthing at Kurt's neck while Kurt panted into the pillow.

"Feel how much you turned me on?" he asked, pushing his hips toward Kurt again. "Feel that?" Kurt nodded. "Been halfway there since you started talking about all the things you want done to you." He reached a hand around and started tracing along the line of Kurt's waistband. Kurt whined and Sebastian hoped that Santana and Rachel weren't waking up in the living room anytime soon. "Can I?"

Kurt's answer was to grab Sebastian's hand and slide it in himself.

They both groaned at the contact, Sebastian thrusting once more. "God, you'd look beautiful like that," he said as he started stroking. "Hands tied to the headboard, legs spread wide to take whatever you can get. I'd tie you up with those old Dalton ties. Might as well get one more use out of them." Kurt laughed, a sound that was choked off when Sebastian tightened his grip. "And when I know that you can't move, I'd sink my mouth down on your cock. Feel so good in my hand, but it'd be be even better in my mouth. Then, right when you think you're gonna come, I'll back off and leave you begging." He did just that, switching to a light tracing of fingers along his length. Kurt whimpered and pushed forward, searching for more.

"Please. Yes, that, please."

"You like that, huh?" Sebastian asked, wrapping his fingers around the hard cock once again. "How about then I start to lick your hole? Get you nice and wet for my fingers. Get you all relaxed so I can slip one inside, stretch you out little by little. Two fingers, three. You'd take them so nice, wouldn't you? Just dying to be filled. You keep pushing back like you could take my cock right through your shorts." He wished it were possible, if only to relieve some of the aching pressure. "But not right now. Right now, I'm just gonna keep stroking your cock and telling you about how I'd make your little fantasy come true. How I'd get a nice vibrator, long and thick, and ease it into you slowly once I got you wide open. Once I got it in, I'd turn it on just the lowest notch. And I'd fuck you with it, turning it up a little at a time and riding it right on that little sweet spot. Get you right on the edge, and then turn it off. Let you come down until you start bitching at me, and then," Sebastian leaned up and nibbled at Kurt's ear, whispering, "I'll turn it all the way back on to shut you up."

He twisted on the upstroke and pulled tight on the way down, repeating the rhythm. "Back and forth, off and on, until you're so strung out you can't think about anything other than me and how much you want to come. That's when I'll let you. Bury that toy deep inside you all the way on, me jerking your cock as you twitch and moan underneath me." He ran his thumb over the tip. "Come for me, Kurt."

Kurt screamed into the pillow, come flowing over Sebastian's fist. Sebastian kept stroking as he rutted against Kurt's ass, hips twisting to find just the right friction on his own cock. A few more thrusts, and he had to bite into Kurt's shoulder to keep his groan to a reasonable decibel level as he pulsed in his boxers.

They lay there unmoving. Breathing deep and Sebastian's hand still resting in Kurt's underwear.

"This is gonna be awkward in the morning, isn't it?" Sebastian asked.

"Not if you make me a good breakfast to counter my hangover."


	3. It's the Little Imperfections

_Written for Day 5 of Kurtbastian Week, funerals._

* * *

**October 2015**

Sure, they'd been living together for a month, but Sebastian thought it'd take a lot longer than that for Kurt to end up crying on the couch over something that was apparently his fault.

"Whoa, whoa, hey now, what did I do?" he asked. "Because we were cool when you left for classes this morning and I haven't mortally offended you or yours in any way since then, so you're gonna have to clue me in here."

"You got me hooked on this stupid show!" Both sets of eyes turned back to the TV where a fire was frozen on the screen. Sebastian examined it more closely, taking in the construction of the fire and the men in the foreground, and realized what his hysterical boyfriend was talking about.

"Which episode is it?"

"The zombie one with Bobby's wife and the mom from Suite Life."

"Oh, babe." Sebastian sat on the couch and wrapped Kurt in his arms. The other boy went willingly, pressing his face to Sebastian's chest. Bobby Singer was definitely Kurt's favorite character on Supernatural. Kurt claimed is was because of the snark, but Sebastian had a theory about Bobby being an alcoholic demon hunter version of Burt Hummel.

An episode where he had to kill his wife and hold a hunter's funeral in the junkyard? That was never going to sit well. And season seven was going to be really hard.

"I told you to wait until I was here before you watched it."

"I thought that was because you wanted to see it yourself. You always say that about the funny ones." Kurt sniffed. "I just wanted to watch something with hot guys, not so many dead people."

He chuckled. "I think you picked the wrong show to watch."

Kurt hit him without any force. "Tell me something I don't know, asshole."

"You're gonna cry a lot more before you make it through the season."

"I said something I don't know."

Sebastian wracked his brain for what episode was next. "There's some young Sam coming up."

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"And no sadness?"

"Not that I remember. So why don't we watch Karen's funeral and then we'll keep going, okay?"

Forty-five minutes later, Kurt was hitting him with a pillow and promising no sex for a week.


	4. The One Thing Stronger Than the Whiskey

_Written for Day 4 of Kurtbastian Week, fighting._

* * *

**May 2016**

"It's late."

Sebastian sighed as he shut the front door. "I know."

"You come home at one in the morning, three hours after your shift is supposed to be over, and all you say is 'I know'?"

"I got tied up at work," he explained, tucking his keys back into his pocket. He had an opening shift in the morning and only so many pairs of black slacks to wear with the uniform green button down. Nothing spilled on him that night so he'd be able to get another wear out of those pants, much to Kurt's chagrin.

Speaking of his boyfriend, Kurt was standing at their tiny kitchen sink, determinedly not looking at Sebastian. "You got tied up."

Clearly, he was unimpressed.

"Yes, Janelle was supposed to close but she called in sick this afternoon and Doug asked me to stick around to cover duties."

"And you couldn't call me?"

"I told you, the last five people who got caught with their phones out while they were on the clock were fired on the spot." He pulled his phone out of his pocket and waved it around. "There's no three strikes. And we can't afford for me to lose this job now." He set it on the table next to the door.

"I know." While their parents were perfectly okay with floating rent and spending money their way while they were in school, it had been understood that graduation was the cutoff and they'd have to take care of themselves. "But that doesn't stop me from worrying that you got mugged or jumped or something and you're bleeding in an alley somewhere."

"It's half a block walk to the subway stop and another half a block home after I get off," he said as he rooted around in the refrigerator for some food. "All of it's well-lit and in safe neighborhoods. What the hell could happen to me?"

"Well I don't fucking know!" Kurt slammed the mug he had been washing onto the counter and whirled around to face him. "Excuse me for caring. It's not like I'm supposed to have an opinion on my boyfriend, who I love, wandering around the city late at night and working way more hours than he should. I know you said you'd be picking up more shifts at the restaurant after graduation while you wait to hear back from companies, but this is ridiculous."

That put him on his guard. He carefully shut the fridge door. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that you spend all your time at work or looking for work."

Sebastian scoffed. "You're one to talk. You've spent more nights on Finn and Rachel's couch in the past two months than you have in our bed."

"I'm surprised you realized seeing as you're never here either."

"I'm trying to pay bills. You're the one working for nothing all day with that stupid start-up designer."

"Jim pays me."

"Jim doesn't pay you shit, and what he does pay you is because he likes your ass." They had talked about it before, but it still really bugged him.

"At least I don't actually flaunt my ass for a couple extra bucks in tips."

"You know what? Fuck you, Hummel." Sebastian turned on his heel and walked to the door. "Just… fuck you." He made sure to slam the door behind him as hard as he could before he sprinted down the flight of stairs to the street.

It was still warm outside, so he tucked his hands in his pockets and walked down the street. He could feel his keys, which was good, but not his phone, which was bad. When he remembered it's place on the little entry table, he almost went back, but thought better of it. If he went back now, he and Kurt would just get into it again and they needed time to cool off.

It was far from the first time they had fought, even since they had gotten together. But it hurt Sebastian more than usual this time. He admitted sometimes he flirted and put on a bit of a show for customers, but he was working a less than minimum wage job and those tips made a difference. The way Kurt had thrown that back in his face, combined with the plans he'd had for the night before Janelle had called in sick.

It was, simply put, a shit storm.

Around the corner from their apartment was a little hole-in-the-wall lesbian bar that they visited frequently. It was a nice quiet place to just get a drink and maybe a bite to eat. The staff of JR's were wary when they first showed up. Apparently they'd had problems in the past with men coming in who thought the clientele just needed a good dicking to straighten them out. Then the night manager Miriam saw them, proclaimed them to be her "new adorable pet gay boys," and things were mostly smooth sailing after that.

Kurt still got into the occasional fight with a patron over her clothing choices.

Sebastian pushed the solid door open. He was met with dim lights and a soft country song from the jukebox in the corner. The place was pretty empty in the middle of the week, so he had a straight shot to the bar where he ordered a Jack and coke. The bartender, a new girl whose name he couldn't remember, smiled at him and informed him she'd have to get a new bottle from the back. He waved her off and was content to enjoy the relative silence.

"Where's your better half?"

He rolled his eyes. "Probably still at home."

"Why didn't you bring him with you?"

"I don't know, Miriam," he snapped. "Maybe because he just accused me of whoring myself out at work for tips."

"Honey, I've visited you at your work," the woman with her hair in a tight brunette bun reminded him. "You kinda do."

"Yeah, but he's my boyfriend, he's supposed to accept this kind of shit about me."

"I'm sure he does."

"Doesn't seem like it." He lit up when the new girl set his drink in front of him, but pouted when Miriam snatched it away and downed it herself. "You can't just take drinks from a paying customer."

"I'm not," she said. "I'm doing a friend a favor. Now you can sit here as long as you like, but I'm not sending you home drunk when you're pissed at Kurt. It'll just makes things worse and I'm not gonna stand for that shit. You two love each other, right?"

"Of course." Questioning that was the farthest thing from his mind.

"Then take my advice. Think about it, go home sober, and talk it out. That boy's probably worried sick over you. I have half a mind to call him."

"Please don't." Sebastian felt defeated now, because he knew she had a point, but he still had a little ground to hold. "I just need a little space and if you call him he'll come down here and yell at me."

He could see the battle waging in her eyes. "Fine. But not one drink. I'll get you a slice of pizza though."

"Thanks." He stared at the bar, scratched from one too many pairs of boots dancing on it. When a plate slid in front of his vision, he asked for a glass of water as well. He started eating, not really tasting but knowing he needed the nourishment.

There wasn't really much to think about. They knew each other well, sometimes too well, and they knew exactly which buttons to push to get a reaction. Kurt had been worried, Sebastian hadn't, which upset Kurt, so he lashed out. It had happened before and it was bound to happen again. He just needed time.

Before he knew it, the pizza was gone. The bartender, who Sebastian finally remembered was named Lindsey, took his ten with instructions to keep the change. He left the bar with a nod to Miriam. The only question remaining was whether Kurt was still upset as well.

The knob turned when Sebastian tested it, which meant that Kurt was most likely still home. He was proven right when he opened the door and had his arms full of crying boyfriend within seconds.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I don't know why I said that, I love you so much, please don't leave."

"Shh, babe." He hated seeing Kurt upset like this, so he just held on. "Don't worry, I'm not leaving. I just went down to JR's and Miriam bitched me out. It's obvious which one of us is her favorite." Kurt chuckled wetly at that. "And I said some things I shouldn't have too, so I'm sorry."

"I just worry."

"I know you do," Sebastian said, caressing his neck gently.

"And most people would probably have this elaborate theory about you cheating and these late nights are you seeing your other boyfriend," he was speaking very quickly, "but I keep thinking about what happens if some guy follows you home from the restaurant because he realized how unfairly hot you are in that stupid uniform and he kidnapped you or cornered you in an alley or something. And it scares me."

That surprised him more than it should have. "You're not worried about me running off with some hypothetical man?"

Kurt shrugged. "Once upon a time, yeah. But it's been a while since I even considered you with anyone but me."

He couldn't help himself. Sebastian bent down and pressed a bruising kiss to Kurt's lips. Kurt was unresponsive for a moment, then threaded a hand into Sebastian's hair to pull him closer.

The make-up sex was definitely the only part of fighting that Sebastian liked.

They made their way over to the bed, not far in the tiny studio, but far enough to have them both tripping on shoes and the half-folded laundry. Kurt fell down on top of the bed and Sebastian almost pounced on top of him. Instead, he went to dig in the jacket pocket of a suit he liked that Kurt refused to touch.

"So, there's a reason I've been working a lot of shifts, and it's not just to pay the bills," Sebastian admitted. "I kinda took out a loan from my dad and I'm trying to pay him back."

"A loan?" Kurt sat up straight on the bed. "Bas, why did you need a loan from your dad? Are we having more trouble than you're telling me?"

"No, nothing like that." He sat on the bed next to Kurt. "It's more of a big purchase kind of thing."

"What kind of big purchase?"

Sebastian opened his hand and showed Kurt the little gold ring laid with diamonds. "Engagement ring." Kurt gasped, eyes filling with tears. "I know we said we'd wait until after we got out of school and got real jobs, but I was having enough trouble with the first part, so the second part would have been impossible." Kurt still hadn't said anything. Sebastian just slid the ring onto his finger. "So, Kurt Hummel, will you marry me?"

His answer was to be pinned to the bed and kissed so hard their teeth clacked.


	5. Let the Angels Gather Let the Music Play

_Written for Day 6 of Kurtbastian Week, wedding bells._

* * *

**June 2017**

"Your cousin is terrorizing the bartender."

"So?"

"Don't we have to give them hazard pay?"

"We don't have to anything. Jim is paying for everything, remember?"

"That doesn't mean he should have to pay extra. Besides, between what he pays me now and your promotion, we could have paid for everything ourselves, so I don't see why—"

"Babe, Jim owes you his soul since you introduced him to Santana and she agreed to be the face of his line during her CD promotion."

"Oh god, now Puck is matching her shot for shot."

"Look, if there's any structural damage to the hall, we'll cover that for Jim. He could easily pay for it, but if it'll help soothe your conscience…"

"It would, thank you very much."

"We've only been married for an hour and already you're beating me down to do what you want."

"And how is that different from our pre-marriage life?"

"Well, it's not like anyone can stop me from doing this now."

_"Bas, do not grope my ass in front of everyone we know!"_

"Again, how is that any different from what we did before the ceremony?"

"Normally it's just our friends, but my Aunt Mildred is sitting over there. Can you just restrain yourself until this evening?"

"It's cute that you want to wait until our wedding night. Not taking into account every other time we've fucked already."

"For the last time, we're not sneaking off to the coatroom to get off. We have guests to entertain."

"But it'll be fun. A lot better than twirling around to some country song you happened to like."

"You're right. Why should I think my first dance with my husband would be any kind of special event?"

"You married me, babe. You knew what you were getting into."


	6. She's So Little (She's Gonna Get Bigger)

_Written for Day 1 of Kurtbastian Week, meeting the family._

* * *

**August 2019**

The phone was ringing, overly loud in the darkness and Sebastian just wanted it to shut up. He was grateful that his husband grabbed it because the obnoxious tune stopped, but apparently Kurt decided to answer it because he was talking. Sebastian rolled over and snuggled into his side, pressing his face into the naked chest and making it his pillow. Kurt spoke for a few more minutes, fingers soft in Sebastian's hair. When the talking stopped, instead of cuddling back into bed, Kurt slid out from under the covers, leaving Sebastian face-planted into the sheets.

"Wus goin on? Who died?"

Kurt snorted and tossed a pair of sweatpants at Sebastian. "Wrong end of life. Get dressed, we're going to the hospital."

"It's," he fumbled with the clock, "7am on a Saturday."

"Yes, and maternity visiting hours start at eight."

The pieces finished falling together. 'Hospital,' 'maternity,' the frantic phone call from Finn last night as they sat down with dinner.

"Rachel had the baby."

"About half an hour ago," Kurt confirmed, voice coming from the walk-in. "Finn would have called sooner, but Rachel's dads refused to hang up until all their questions were answered."

Sebastian bypassed the sweats and went straight for the dresser. Slipping into a pair of silk boxers (he liked his underwear stylish when he actually decided to wear it) he followed Kurt into the closet. "Are florists open this early or should we stick to gift shop flowers?"

"There's a 24 hour place on the way. Yellow orchids?"

"Closest to a gold star we can get." He buttoned his jeans and tugged a t-shirt over his head. "I'll grab the bag and we can go."

"I still need to brush my teeth and you should too, Bas!" Kurt called.

He groaned. "Yes, mother."

By the time they were on the subway, nearly half an hour had passed since the call. They arrived on Rachel's floor five minutes after eight and received her info from the front desk. The door was half-open, so they let themselves in.

Rachel looked exhausted, but she was smiling. She was looking at Finn, who had his back to them. When Kurt knocked on the wall, her eyes cut to them and she smiled wider. "Hi boys."

Kurt hustled over to her bedside. He set the rather large flower arrangement on the small table and kissed her forehead. "You look beautiful."

She rolled her eyes. "Stop lying."

"Yeah Kurt, stop lying," Sebastian echoed, his tone teasing. "Rach, you're kinda glowing, but you look like you went seven rounds in the zombie apocalypse."

Kurt looked like he was about ready to tell him off, despite Rachel's amused expression, but the words died in his throat when Finn turned around with a bundle in his arms.

A little pink bundle.

"Guys," he whispered. "Meet Christina Willow Berry-Hudson."

Sebastian stopped breathing for a moment. She had a bright pink face with a tiny nose and tiny mouth and tiny grey eyes and a little dark tuft of hair sticking out of the tiny hat on her head. She was looking around the room with wide eyes, trying to take in everything about the strange new world.

"She's perfect."

Finn grinned and nodded at Sebastian's words. "Wanna hold her?"

Sebastian backed off slightly as Kurt bolted around, grabby hands waiting for his niece. "He was right. He gets dibs. If she'd been a boy, I would've been first."

"You two bet first to hold on the gender?" Rachel asked.

"You refused to find out, so we had to do something," Kurt explained as Finn settled the baby in his arms. "Hi sweetheart," he said quietly. "I'm your Uncle Kurt. I'm gonna make sure you have only the most fabulous clothes as you grow up. Here's hoping you don't inherit your fashion sense from either of your parents."

Sebastian ignored the token protests from the hospital bed where Finn had sat next to his wife and wrapped her in his arms. Instead, he pulled out the little stuffed animal he had bought on a whim seven months ago soon after they found out about Rachel's pregnancy. He waited impatiently for Kurt to finish his first cuddle and girl chat with his niece.

When she was finally placed in his arms, he was overwhelmed. In that moment, this little girl was his world.

"Hey Stina," he said. "I'm Uncle Sebastian. And I promise you I will be here anytime you need me. And just in case I can't or you don't want to talk with me…" He shifted his arms slightly and brought the little stuffed meerkat into her view. "This is Timon. And he'll always be there for you too. And he is just the first of many things I plan to buy you because you are my little princess."

"You're such a sap," Kurt said, reminding him that he wasn't alone.

"Shut up, you had a chance to get to know her. It's my turn now." He looked back down and noted with a smile that she had fallen asleep in his arms.


	7. Tourist Season, Shoot Them At Will

_Written for Day 7 of Kurtbastian Week, AU/crossover._

* * *

**July 2020**

"Sebby!"

Sebastian rolled his eyes at the voice on the phone. "What is it, Tish?"

The laughter that rang down the line made it obvious that she knew how much it pissed him off. "Well my dear cousin, my friend Piper's daughter is looking into her masters for art at Columbia. So instead of making her take vacation time, Trucker decided to shut down the shop for a week and have everyone come to New York."

"Wait, you're in the city?"

"Yeah, you still live in that building where I sent your last Christmas card?"

"Same apartment for two years." Now he was suspicious. "Why?"

She giggled. "You'll see."

"Dammit Tish, just tell me—" But she had hung up. He stared at the cell phone and wondered what she was up to now.

Then came the knock at the door. "I got it," Kurt yelled from the living room. Sebastian tried to run out to warn him, but the door was already opening and a man with a bright purple mohawk and a t-shirt proclaiming a belief in Bigfoot was dropping a duffle bag and throwing his arms around Kurt.

"Dude!" The guy was excited, but Kurt was shell-shocked, arms frozen at his sides. Sebastian couldn't help himself, he started laughing at the sight before him.

He let go, allowing Tish to sidestep him and get inside. She looked from Kurt to Sebastian further back, then smacked the unique man in the back of the head. "Priestly, that's not Sebastian, that's his husband."

"Well if you'd let me come to the wedding, I'd know that."

"You had the flu. You told me to go and let Zo give you ten million herbal remedies."

"Semantics."

Sebastian looked between the two, then hurried forward to hug his cousin. "Fuck, I've missed you Tish."

She wrapped him up and squeezed. "Missed you too, Sebby."

"Watch it, Tish."

They separated and the woman grabbed mohawk's hand. "Guys, this is Priestly. Priestly, this is Sebastian," she pointed to him, and then to Kurt, "and that's his husband Kurt."

Priestly stuck out his hand. "Nice to meet you."

Kurt eyed him skeptically, but seemed to think he was mostly harmless. "Nice to meet you too." Then his eyes darted up to the rather tall hair. "Interesting hair."

"Thanks, man." Priestly smiled widely, his lip ring glinting in the lamplight. "I do it myself. Change the color every week or so."

"And it hasn't all fallen out yet?"

Tish giggled at the stricken look on Priestly's face. "Dude, don't even joke," he said. "Not cool on any level."

Kurt wrapped an arm around Sebastian's waist and asked, "So, what are you two doing here?"

"Julia wanted to check Columbia for grad school," Priestly explained, "so Piper wanted time off for her and Noah come with. Trucker just closed the shop and called it a family vacation."

"Excuse me, Trucker?"

"He's our boss," Tish said. "He and his wife Zo are probably wandering through Central Park holding hands right about now. Jen said something about her and Fuzzy taking their daughter to the Statue of Liberty and Julia is touring campus with her parents."

"And you all work together?"

"Zo's in her shop across the street and Noah and Fuzzy just married in and show up a lot. But yeah. We're all one big dysfunctional family."

"Has one of the men gotten his best friend's girlfriend pregnant?"

"Um…" Tish exchanged a confused glance with Priestly. He shrugged. "No."

"Then you can't even touch dysfunctional." Sebastian burst out laughing. New Directions was seven different levels of dysfunctional compared to the tales he's heard from the sandwich shop. "In my high school glee club, that was just the first drama we encountered."

"The first one?" Priestly was interested. He dragged Kurt to the couch, settling in for a good story. "Was it like a soap opera? Lying, cheating, and backstabbing? Did someone have an evil twin?" His eyes lit up. "Please tell me someone had an evil twin."

"We're still looking for Santana's good twin," Kurt quipped. "Although Brittany did have a theory about Blaine and Rachel…"

Sebastian smiled at the two of them, then turned to Tish. "You wanna crash here? We have the spare bedroom."

She kicked the duffle bag. "I was hoping you'd say that." He rolled his eyes and hoisted it onto his shoulder, leading her down the hall. "We sure know how to pick the good ones, don't we cuz?"

"Yeah, we do." He opened the door and glanced around, thankful that Kurt's dedication to cleaning meant the room was actually in good shape. "Here you go." He dropped the bag on the bed and left the room.

"Thanks Sebby."

"Bite me Platicia."


End file.
